Thursday, September 30, 2004

Piercings - at the sharp end of life

I work at a large teaching institution in Sunny Devon as I have mentioned and this time of year the place is teeming with new students all busily going about their business of finding where the cheapest beer is. Now one of the perks of having a job in this sort of institution is the look but don’t touch rule. (I have broken that one and of course that’s another story!) It’s very nice to be able to sit, whilst having one’s sandwiches, and enjoy the sprightly steps and varied body shapes of the young female students innocently wandering around the campus unknowingly being, I think the technical term is ‘leched .

Anyone who has spent any amount of time doing this and I guess when I say anyone, I mean those of us guys in our advancing years who will glory at the sight of all those uncovered navels and softly swelling bellies. And blimey, if jeans and trouser waists drop any further south we’ll be seeing those things wot we are not meant to! I mean just what are the technical terms for the smooth creases at the top of the inner thighs. I mean those bits that sort of draw your eyes inwards and downwards from the belly to almost – yes almost the pudenda!

Anyway I digress, see what a minefield this subject is! The whole point of this blog is summer is waning and soon these very same girls will be covered up in their winter woollies and all we will get to see of them is their faces. So why is it that the uglier the girl is the more facial piercing she’ll have? I mean I just don’t get it. Why do people pierce their bodies? Ok I do have one earlobe pierced and it was done many years ago. And yes I do have a small but tasteful tattoo on my left shoulder (birthday present from ex-wife). But facial piercing? Come on. I mean how they kiss; presuming that is someone does actually want to kiss them.

There does seem to be some awful correlation that seems to suggest the uglier the girl is the more piercing she will have. What does that mean? Is she drawing attention to her features saying ‘I don’t care cos you don’t really know the real me’ or perhaps she hopes that the glare of all that steel will dazzle the eye of the beholder so that he won’t notice her looks?

Anyway I don’t want people to think I’m some sort of sexist or misogynist, I’m not I love women, some of them are my best friends, but I just don’t get this piercing stuff and have simply noticed the ugliness/piercing correlation. And wanted to give it an airing and perhaps someone will illuminate me so that I get the point!

I am sure that as a student of the social I should be able to come up with some convincing theory. But at a base level I am just a man and I like women to look like women, not like something from a Steven King Book.

And what about metal detectors at airports it must be hell. Beep! ‘O yes that’s my tummy stud’ Beep! O yes my clitoral ring (doesn’t bear thinking about does it) Beep! Ah my tongue stud.

Come on girls get a grip!

Hello and welcome to my surgery

Hello I'm Dr. Rob and my surgery is now open for business. I warn you now that I am a quack of the worst sort and an imposter. I can of course give you help and advice but given that my Doctorate is in Sociology it may well be that the advice I give is not the sort one requires. So maybe you'll want to just pop that top back on and lets settle down to this new experience of Blogging.

I will freely admit that this is my third attempt to get on the airwaves as it were, to punish the world of geeks and internet nerds ( I am sorry but I am not sure of the correct technical terms for you people) with my purile and witless thoughts. Yes I say witless because, of course, just because I have a PhD that doesn't make me intelligent at all. I am sure the following posts will testify to that only too clearly.

Let me just mention that the reasons for doing a Phd are often myriad, but for my friend he wanted to become Doc Martin for obvious reasons and I wanted to become Dr. Robert notably because there is a Beatles record of that name

'Ring my friend I said you'd call Dr. Robert,Day or night he'll be there anytime at all Dr. Robert'


and there is a rock star similarly named. So there, good reasons or what?

My surgery then is a small office, I say office, it once used to house the photocopier and a filing cabinet, looking out over the campus of a university in Sunny Devon, I know you can guess where I am (hint look at my email address).

I have been looking at a few blogs over these few weeks and particularly like Watski's World and Zen and the art of Guitar Maintenence and as mentioned above attempted twice to get off the ground myself. But I think this is it.

So here goes, lets get diagnosing or at least sorting out the zeitgeist