These are my New Year resolutions:
1. I will not attempt to overthrow the legally elected government of the United States of America – not this year anyway
2. I do not intend to get any of my bits pierced ( accidental piercing don’t count)
3. I will remain continent
4. I will not lower myself and respond to the constant sexual harassment I suffer by watching all those RnB babes shaking their booties on MTV, Beyonce in particular is lucky I don’t sue
5. Once again this year and since being able to read, I will not believe in aliens, or that human beings were ‘seeded’ onto this earth by aliens and the evidence is in the bible, this is an emergency resolution bought on by a particularly boring New Years eve guest last night, who I believe in a strange twist of fate will never be coming again, if I have my way – perhaps an alien abduction!
6. I will not persecute and harass forever the three young local boys whom I just caught tiptoeing up our front path casting avaricious glances at my mountain bike.
7. Once I have won the lottery I will pay someone to blog for me – that’s how shallow I am
Happy New Year and Snovom Godom to all my Russian/Ukrainian readers!
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