Daddy's takin' us to the zoo

Daddy’s takin’ us to the zoo tomorrow,
Zoo tomorrow, zoo tomorrow
Daddy’s takin’ us to the zoo tomorrow
And we can stay all day!

Chorus:
We’re goin’ to the zoo, zoo, zoo
How about you, you, you?
You can come too, too, too
We’re goin’ to the zoo, zoo, zoo.

See the elephant with the long trunk swingin’
In a concrete pen that’s really mingin’
And a kangaroo that’s never springin’
And we can stay all day!

(chorus)

See all the monkeys they’re bored bored bored
Sittin’ around being bored bored bored
Hangin’ by the long-tail (bored bored bored)
And they must stay all day!

(chorus)

There’s a big giraffe and he’s lick lick lickin’
It’s a psychological tic is his lick lick lickin’
All the animals behaviour is sick sick sicknin’
I don’t want to stay all day!

(chorus)

The lions and the tigers are apathetic
The lizards and the snakes are catatonic
The miserable monkeys are just pathetic
Why must they stay this way?

(chorus)

We’ve been to the zoo zoo zoo
So have you you you
You came too too too
Are you ashamed too too too?

I’m not going to the zoo tomorrow!
Zoo tomorrow, zoo tomorrow!
I’m not going to the zoo tomorrow
Not even if you pay!



I don’t like zoo’s. I think I mentioned this in one of my last postings. But my new wife and my daughter wanted to go, so as the dutiful loving husband and father we went to Paignton zoo yesterday.

I must say first that it is quite well laid out in a wooded valley that one has to walk around to see the inmates – never has death row had such a rural feel to it. The happiest of the exhibits must be the wild rabbits that look fat and unconcerned at the proximity of humans and the various seagulls and other wild (and free) birds that enter the competition for the free food handouts.

The most animated of all the animals that I saw on this trip were the human beings, the inmates, served their time in a listless, apathetic stupor, much as I suppose humans on death row do. The most animated of all the animals on display was a lioness who was being teased mercilessly by a squirrel with a death wish, who’s destiny it seemed, if it was not so fleet footed, was to end up as a tasty snack sized supplement to the lionesses diet. The humans who were watching this little drama were more interested in the common or garden grey squirrel than the sad moulting lion and his mate – the Kings of the Jungle whiling away their time on earth (Hakuna Matata!) – the highlight of their day their joint of horse or cow being flung into the enclosure.

I know that these places spin up the rationale for existing as being a necessary part of the protection of such wild life and that if it were not for the breeding programmes then some of these animals might not exist now. But at the nitty gritty end of this business, it is simply that - a business, these animals become commodities in the same way as human prisoners have become a commodity for such organisations as Group 4 security. People make money out of the incarceration of both species.

I would accept the notion of breeding to re-stock the wild because after all it is through the activities of humans and mainly humans from the West that many of these species are at risk and we need to redress the balance. But please lets do it properly, lets give these animals a decent life, somewhere decent to live, something to occupy their time. Maybe the Romans had some of the best ideas about how to keep lions entertained! We could start by culling politicians, pop stars and celebrities just to start with - I will entertain any other suggestions for the Lions you might want to come up with!

O and:

I saw green alligators and long-necked geese,
Some humpy-backed camels and some chimpanzees.
Some cats and rats and elephant, but sure as you're born,
I never saw no unicorn!